My Life In A Thread...And Future Birdy Plans! - Talk Parrots Forums

 
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post #1 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-05-2013, 09:11 PM Thread Starter
 
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My Life In A Thread...And Future Birdy Plans!

Firstly, I want to apologize to everyone. I have not been on recently and I've been really, really busy and distracted. But you guys have always been there for me and have been really great, so I thought this would be a place that I could come share some of what's been going on as well as my future plans for the birds.

Right now, I own two birds. A budgie and a cockatiel. That is it. I was going through some really tough times. I mainly mean my bipolar. I was recently diagnosed. It was something we had suspected for a while, and I've always dealt with severe ADD, depression and anxiety. I was in a terrible place, I was in a place where I did not feel it was fair for the birds or me, so I rehomed. It was a really rough time. I had started school at a reputable community college with plenty of classes and ended up dropping all of them because I couldn't handle it. I couldn't keep any part time jobs, a lot of it due to anxiety.

More recently, I was let go of my nanny job (although I still have no clue why) and therefore was unable to continue my horse lease and lessons. I had depended on that job, and they randomly thought it was okay to let me go in the middle of the week.

These past few weeks have been extra hard. My boyfriend/almost fiancÚ broke up with me. He's very, very ill. Like, dying ill. Because he rescued a cat and the cat gave him something really bad. It's completely understandable that he broke up with me, he NEEDS time to focus on himself and on his health. But it still hurts like crazy. He's my best friend. We are still in contact, and we still see each other from time to time, but it wasn't like it was before. He says he still sees me in his future, that he just has to get through what's going on now. I miss him so bad, and because I'm not going to school or working, I had endless amounts of time to cry...

I am, however, happy to announce that I was hired at Cold Stone Creamery yesterday. I am feeling much better than I had before. I finally feel like there is still hope. Yes, I'm still terribly sad about my ex and about everything bad that's been going on. But my doctors got me on meds that are finally working and giving me consistency. And...my room is clean! It sounds silly to say, but I have always had trouble with organization. But we finally went into my bedroom, cleaned it up, and I've been able to keep up on it pretty consistently. That's quite an achievement for me, LOL. If my room is clean, I feel so much better about everything else in my life.

So, it's kind of hard to conclude exactly how life is going at this point. I've just gone through one of the hardest things I've ever been through, but there are some huge things that are finally going right. Everything's just... odd.

Now, onto more birdy-related topics! I have this plan. And it might not be the most practical thing around at this point, but I'm a bit of a different person - because I struggle with so much, it's extremely important for me to feel good about something, to have a few things going right. It's hard to explain...but anyways, my plan is this -

1.) I work at Cold Stone, save up my money, and possibly get a second job so I can save even more.

2.) As I make my money, I shall put part of my money away for emergencies, for the future, the boring stuff as I like to call it, the stuff my parents insist I save for. (LOL - I'm just joking, it really is important.) And the other part, I want to save. What am I saving for, you ask?

Well... I'm pretty sure I've determined I'm going to do this, but don't hate me if it doesn't happen.... I think I'm going to be saving for... a Congo African Grey!

3.) During these months I'm saving, I'll show my parents that I can keep my room completely clean and organized. If I do that, I can move into the extra room in the basement. And then I will transform my old room upstairs into the bird room.

4.) I will purchase a cage and all necessary supplies and equipment first, decorate the bird room with everything, and then save for the African Grey. I plan on getting a baby, unless another option comes up.


That's my plan! I think it's really good for me, it will motivate me, it will make me feel good about myself to accomplish that and it will be absolutely wonderful to have a parrot in my life again. My parents are pretty much on board with it. (For those of you who don't know, I'm 18, graduated high school last year, and still live with my parents.)

I want to let you all know how important you are to me. I can't wait to hear your responses to my novel-length post. I plan to definitely post more often. (Since Daisy passed me in number of posts, it's always been my goal to catch up with her. I shall accomplish that eventually! LOL!)

Love you guys! Thanks for reading!




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post #2 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-05-2013, 11:32 PM
 
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thinking of you Abby. really hope this job works out well and your saving is fruitful

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post #3 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-05-2013, 11:58 PM


 
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Good luck.. I hope your meds work and you get on a level you can deal with... Do you know what your ex caught from the cat? I remember when he rescued it... I hope he's better soon! Good luck saving for your new friend!
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post #4 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 12:10 AM


 
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I'm really sorry for everything you have been going through....it sounds so hard! Glad you're optimistic about the future and are in a better place now.

If I were you, though, I would just stick with the two birds you have left for the time being.
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post #5 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 06:09 AM



 
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Great to hear your life is back on track again and you're going to be a regular on here from now I'm sure I'm not the only person who wants to hear/see more about your current birds too

I'm going to explain to people on your behalf, I hope you don't mind! Just so you don't feel pressured.

First I'm going to mention Daisy, the Goffin's cockatoo. I'm not sure where Abby posted it before, but I'm certain that we all know about Daisy, right? Well for those who don't. Daisy's original owner really wanted Daisy back and had been speaking to Abby for a very long time about it. Eventually, Abby thought it would be the right thing to do and gave her back to her. It was a very hard decision but at least she is back with her original owner who Abby has been able to keep in contact with

Phoebe, the yellow streaked lory, was only supposed to be a foster, though Abby wanted to see how things went and she may have kept her based on that decision. It was me who told Abby to get her and foster her until she found the appropriate home and that is what she did. A month or so ago? I think! Phoebe found her new home through Facebook and she is now living with a loving family

The cockatiel Abby currently has is one of the two babies she took in a little while back. The white face pearl pied passed away shortly after Abby got them and the normal white face too began to go down hill. However, she suddenly shocked us all by perking up and now she's as active as ever! Abby still has her and has the intention of having her in the new bird room where she can have more freedom. She is still disabled, obviously, but she is getting on wonderfully. You can read about them here https://www.talkparrots.com/showthread.php?t=10529 for those who don't remember

Holly, the budgie, was rehomed with the zebra finch flock (I think... correct me if I'm wrong Abby!). She had loved being in their large cage with them and hanging out with them. Abby took the zebra finches in off somebody who needed an emergency rehome and so again, she was only fostering them. When she decided it was time to let them go she felt that Holly would be better off going with them too where she could be a part of their flock. I know Abby thought a lot of Holly, again she did the right thing by keeping her happy

Autumn, the green cheek conure, has also been rehomed. Autumn came after Apple, and Apple had set a very high expectation of what a green cheek conure would/should be like. At first, through her baby stages, Autumn was a lovely, sweet little bird. As she started to mature though she became highly aggressive. Abby didn't want to clip her due to her disability. She needed her to fly to be able to get around and unfortunately she saw this as a really good way of attacking Abby. She would often fly at her face. Abby was putting up with it until she attacked other members of the family. She was rehomed to somebody else who is trying to sort out the problem

Abby got another budgie last month? Or the month before... I don't remember. S/he is an opaline cobalt budgie called Axel. Abby has been working on taming and training with him/her. Oddly, he is extremely bonded to the cockatiel (I'm unsure if you've named that tiel yet?) and follows her everywhere. They've become quite the pair! He even preens her

Back in June, while Abby was working at the bird farm, she decided she was going to bring home another CAG. After attempting to get Alex back many times with no luck (and Kiki too) she decided she would move on and save up for another. She had put a deposit down on her new baby but unfortunately due to financial issues at the time she could no longer afford him and had to leave it. You can find the thread here https://www.talkparrots.com/showthread.php?t=7842

Abby has had a really hard time with her birds. She lost Rosco, her first ever bird. Minnie passed away due to egg laying issues and was always at her avian vets. Tigger the elderly cockatiel passed away. She rehomed Kiki, Alex, her budgies and Aria the cockatiel and almost immediately regretted the decision and tried very, very hard to get everybody back but had no luck at all. I won't go in to details but Alex's new owner became very nasty and tried to rehome him almost straight away to somebody else and wouldn't let Abby have him unless she paid a LOT more than what she paid for him! Since then Abby has taken on some fosters who she was helping people rehome, mostly budgies. Now she's back on track she's trying to focus her time and effort into giving her current birds and her new African grey the best lives possible

We're all here for you
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post #6 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 07:13 AM Thread Starter
 
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That was probably a much more accurate description of my history with birds than I could have explained. You are very observant, Daisy! Thank you so much!




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post #7 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 09:24 AM



 
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No problem but you definitely need to make birdy photo threads and I won't be happy until you do


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post #8 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 11:59 AM


 
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Glad to hear an update on you Abby, I was wondering how you were doing because you seemed to disappear there for a while even on Facebook!

So exciting that you will be saving up for CAG, that's my goal too! Except for TAG, lol. That'll be so exciting for you and I hope it works out well and nothing goes wrong like with the last baby you had planned on.

I'm hear any time if you need to talk as well.. you know where to find me on Facebook.
Can't wait to see photos of your FIDs!



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post #9 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 12:49 PM Thread Starter
 
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You're amazing, Kayla! I love you! And yeah, things have been rough. I'm not saying in any way that my life is terrible and that it's worse than yours kind of thing, I'm just saying I've been going through some things that have been distracting me and getting me down. :/

I prefer CAG's. I don't know why! I like their size, the way they look, and I've always had good experiences with them. I often hear TAG's have a better personality though.

And I love to bug you on Facebook so you don't have to remind me of that. I'll probably go bug you right now, actually...LOL.

Thanks again!




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post #10 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 01:58 PM


 
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Hi Abby,
I'm sorry that you've had such a hard time.
You are still young. I wish you so much that you can learn to live with the bipolar desease and have a happy life although.

It made me sad to read about your bad luck with your parrots also, especially with Autumn.
Unfortunately that could happen with every parrot species you get as a single baby.
Going through their puberty is much easier for them with a partner of their species.
So I would like to suggest you to get two African Greys, so that you won't get disappointed again.l
In your case I would save for two parrots and a large cage.
Maybe your Dad could help you building a parrot tree and a play stand by yourself.

When the puberty of my linnies began I waited for something to happen, but it didn't.
They were the same as before. The only differences were that they began to lay their legs over each other and defend their cage like every healthy animal would defend its territory.

What do you think about that idea?
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post #11 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 02:21 PM


 
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Thanks for the explanation, Daisy. I was wondering what had happened to all those birds, but didn't want to pry. Abby, I know you don't owe anyone an explanation, either.

If you do decide to get a grey, maybe go with an older bird whose personality is already known, so you won't have to deal with a difficult hormonal period? And it wouldn't be a bad idea to have a "back up" foster home lined up in case things come up in your personal life and you are temporarily unable to care for the bird. That way you wouldn't have to rehome again. Just a thought.
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post #12 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 02:33 PM
 
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Abby what a bumpy road you have been on! and made the decision to get off. You've come along way being able to share your life. Planning and putting your thoughts done on paper kudos! As for the love of your life sounds like you are still his too. Let him know you will always be there for him. Let him take it one day at a time and follow his lead. As for the African Grey remember you are single, still live at home one day you will move on. Will your parents be able to keep the bird or a back up plan at least. An African Grey is too loud for apartments. They need hours of your time one on one every day. When you feel the time is right for an African Grey get only one. Just my thoughts hoping to give you food for thought to help make the road you are on remain smooth.

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post #13 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 03:08 PM Thread Starter
 
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Thanks but... just no. I'm tired of people talking down to me because I'm younger, when frankly, I've had much more experience with birds than a good majority of you. I understand you think that you know better than me about this stuff because you are older, but you don't. Do you think I would bring another grey into my home if I thought there was even a slight chance I could not keep him or her? Do you think I would work my butt off and spend hours upon hours and thousands upon thousands of dollars on a bird if that was the case?

Sigh...

I know my history with birds does not prove in any way that he/she will stay. In fact, it may look as if there's no chance I will keep the bird. Just because I've had some tough times before doesn't mean I should avoid getting back into what I love forever. I love Greys. I owned, handfed and raised one from as a baby. I worked at a bird specialty store and took care of them daily. I know what I'm getting into, I know the commitment that is required of one. My parents are extremely supportive of my love for birds and if anything were to come up, they would be there to back me up. In fact, they loved to be involved with the birds lives as well, they just aren't as into it as I am.

...You know what, I'm sorry for coming across so rude. Sincerely, I am. I just had to let out some frustration there, part of which had nothing to do with what you guys said. As I look back over what you said, you were merely trying to help me. I don't think you guys had any rude, know-it-all intentions at all. I've had poor experiences before with people who really treated me like crap because I am younger and whatever. So I started to get defensive there.

I guess the point I'm trying to make is I know exactly what I'm getting into. I've put this off for a long time, put A LOT of thought and consideration into it, and I finally have come to the decision that I am ready to handle this bird. Besides, it will be quite a long time before I will actually bring him or her home, so I have that time to think more.

Thanks so much guys...




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post #14 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 03:08 PM



 
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Originally Posted by moonchild View Post
Thanks for the explanation, Daisy. I was wondering what had happened to all those birds, but didn't want to pry. Abby, I know you don't owe anyone an explanation, either.

If you do decide to get a grey, maybe go with an older bird whose personality is already known, so you won't have to deal with a difficult hormonal period? And it wouldn't be a bad idea to have a "back up" foster home lined up in case things come up in your personal life and you are temporarily unable to care for the bird. That way you wouldn't have to rehome again. Just a thought.
No problem Just wanted people to know. She hasn't just had them and then sent them on there way. I know a lot of it has been down to either temporarily caring for them or when she had to give up the first time I mean, I've lost a LOT of birds recently, I imagine some people would be suspicious, probably thinking I'd rehomed them. Unfortnately the necropsy was inconclusive so I still don't have answers
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post #15 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 03:10 PM Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by moonchild View Post
Thanks for the explanation, Daisy. I was wondering what had happened to all those birds, but didn't want to pry. Abby, I know you don't owe anyone an explanation, either.

If you do decide to get a grey, maybe go with an older bird whose personality is already known, so you won't have to deal with a difficult hormonal period? And it wouldn't be a bad idea to have a "back up" foster home lined up in case things come up in your personal life and you are temporarily unable to care for the bird. That way you wouldn't have to rehome again. Just a thought.
I think that's a really good idea. I'm sure my parents will be there to care for my grey if I can't for some reason. But I could also find someone else who would be dedicated to caring for my bird for me if things for some reason go downhill, someone who will simply just foster the bird temporarily. I hope that never has to happen, but it's definitely something I could consider doing. Thank you.




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post #16 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 03:21 PM


 
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Originally Posted by Abby View Post
You're amazing, Kayla! I love you! And yeah, things have been rough. I'm not saying in any way that my life is terrible and that it's worse than yours kind of thing, I'm just saying I've been going through some things that have been distracting me and getting me down. :/

I prefer CAG's. I don't know why! I like their size, the way they look, and I've always had good experiences with them. I often hear TAG's have a better personality though.

And I love to bug you on Facebook so you don't have to remind me of that. I'll probably go bug you right now, actually...LOL.

Thanks again!
Aww shucks. :P
I don't blame you for venting because no matter what anyone else is going through this is hard for YOU. I have battled depression my whole life and my best friend was recently diagnosed with biploar disorder and chronic depression after YEARS of being switched from one medication to the next, all of which never worked. It's hard but you can do it. <3

I love TAGs, I love how slim and smooth they are, ha. Congos just seems so bulky and clumsy to me. Ha.

And I wanted to say that I think you are completely capable of making a decision to add another Grey to your feathered family. You have experience with all types of birds and have gone through hard times and I know you'd be a great Parrot Mama to this CAG.



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post #17 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 04:36 PM


 
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Originally Posted by Abby View Post
I think that's a really good idea. I'm sure my parents will be there to care for my grey if I can't for some reason. But I could also find someone else who would be dedicated to caring for my bird for me if things for some reason go downhill, someone who will simply just foster the bird temporarily. I hope that never has to happen, but it's definitely something I could consider doing. Thank you.
Ideally, I think we should ALL have something like that I fall back on! I don't and it worries me sometimes. The truth is that no future is ever certain and rough patches can happen to anyone.

I hope I didn't seem like I was talking down to you. I can't possibly know your situation because I'm not you. Only YOU know when it's the right time for another bird and when it isn't. Best of luck!
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post #18 of 19 (permalink) Old 11-06-2013, 06:30 PM Thread Starter
 
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Thank you guys! I'm really excited about this new chapter in my life and I can't wait to eventually share it with a grey.




DIGBY 4-year-old male Congo African Grey
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post #19 of 19 (permalink) Old 12-17-2013, 04:13 PM Thread Starter
 
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For a while I was straying away from this idea of a grey, since I got the breeding pair of 'tiels and all. But since they have been unsuccessful, I am considering going back to saving for a grey. I hate to be heartbroken, and that's a good majority of what breeding is. :/ I don't know, I'm still thinking. Any suggestions?




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