Hands up all those whose partner does not understand - Talk Parrots Forums

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post #1 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-28-2011, 02:40 PM Thread Starter


 
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Hands up all those whose partner does not understand

My hubby can't see how much I'd like to keep a bird in the house.
Ever since I tried to save and hand rear my severly underfed cockatiel chick I remembered what it's like to have a bird in the house.
When she wadled over to me it felt so good.
To have her cuddled up asleep on me was a priveledge.
When she couldn't fight anymore I was heartbroken.
It made me realise what I'm missing though.
Now its driving me nuts that I cant even seem to talk to him about it!
Bob is taming really well!
I didn't know where to put this on the forum so I stuck it here, sorry if its the wrong place
just need to have a moan,
It's making me depressed! and where is he tonight????
Off bowling, again!!!!

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post #2 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-28-2011, 02:49 PM
 
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So sorry you're going through that... is there a trade of, or bargain, you can come to? If I can bring the bird in the house you can ______________?



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post #3 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-28-2011, 03:07 PM


 
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Sorry, I don't have a partner living with me so I cant give any advice, but glad I don't after reading your post. I live on my own and it's absolutely lovely, no one is on my back, free to come and go.

Actually come to think of it, I do have partners and they're my birds

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post #4 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-28-2011, 03:25 PM Thread Starter


 
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Tippa I love your birds!
Especially the senegal Duke!
Jenny, he is my best friend, I am not low maintainence!
I need to try and explain to him, I had a Too when we met,
I think he's apprehensive of birds.
When I got Bob it was my intention to put him in an aviary outside.
But my little baby has changed that, and Bob is a sweet boy.
he's taming lovely and he's not a biter.
he's not even lunged at me.
sometimes I think tamed birds are better than hand reared as they're not so bold and bite less.
I have 2 young children (3 and 5) but they loved having the baby bird around and handling her.
My boy loves cleaning up behind Bob.
I think hubby frightened the kids'll get bit.
It's all I've ever wanted in my life,
a parrot.
Well a Too but I've been there!!!
Perhaps I should bite the bullet and explain myself and hear him out.
I know about noise and mess. I'll make sure Bob's in bed by 9.00pm

The pro' s are happy wifey, responsibility for kids. happy Bob.
bird to love! beautiful cage in living room.
Oh help! how do I explain it!

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post #5 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-28-2011, 04:01 PM
 
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Just say... "If I can have this bird, you can go have a big fishing trip (Or something he CONNOT REFUSE!!)!"


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post #6 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-28-2011, 04:07 PM Thread Starter


 
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More bowling,
well he is in the top 40 in the UK but still!
I'm on my own a lot!
company for me!
I'm only out 1 night a week.
we'll see when ~I pluck up courage!
Hate arguing.
Any more positive thoughts please?

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post #7 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-28-2011, 04:48 PM



 
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I feel bad for you because you're not a child so you shouldn't really have a limit! If I were you I'd do exactly what I do, somebody says no I can't so I go and get it anyways, nan was 100% adamant that I couldn't have any indoor birds again. I only had the birds I kept at my ex's and my Chalkie. But I saw the ad for Joey and everybody said no. So I went to the farm and got him! I did the same with my snake hahahah! I know its awful but it works. I now have a huge flock again and I couldn't be happier! Well I could... But I can't push it yet haha, we're getting the galah eventually. Just tell him that its your choice girl! If he can have his hobby then you can have yours! I'm currently teaching my boyfriend how to be a falconer and its hard work. He wouldn't know a hawk from a parrot if he hadn't of met me but he's learnt so much. He adores birds now. And he has happily said that when we move out that every room can be a bird room except for kitchen, bathrooms and our bedroom haha! The garden too is mine as long as he can have a vegetable patch hehehe. He's into reptiles a lot more than I am and I've agreed that we can have those too providing he looks after them. He'll have to give up his job eventually and become a house husband. I also am going to breed my birds and use the money to buy others! Perfect!

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post #8 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-28-2011, 04:52 PM Thread Starter


 
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Ah but I have 2 other hobbies. I play tuned percussion in the local concert band, and I make jewelry. Both of which dont take much time.

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post #9 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-28-2011, 10:48 PM


 
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Kate,
I have an idea for you.
What about keeping Bob both places? Keep your cage for him in the house, but also have your spot for him outdoors. Unless that would be hard on Bob's health.
I have really wanted to put up a small outdoor aviary so that I could take my house birds outside sometimes. I think it would be a wonderful arrangement for Bob whenver the weather permits him to go between the two.
I do understand that during the winter it might be too hard on his system to go in and out - but, during that time, I think he would just have to stay indoors.

I understand your hubby's fear of birds if your cockatoo was unpredictable. A cockatoo is a big bird with the potential to do some serious damage.

I guess my other suggestion is, if your husband is really fearful for the children, to go ahead and put Bob outside but keep a tiel in the house. A tiel is NOT going to hurt your kids. If an indoor tiel is a problem, too, because of dust, there are other birds you could have in the house that couldn't seriously damage your children.

Actually, I have no idea what the beak strength is for an Indian ringneck. I guess a bird could also damage a little kid's face, but I've never heard any horror stories about ring necks doing things like that. Indian ringnecks do not pair up for life - as in mating. Often when you hear of a bird going after someone's face, it is a bird trying to drive someone away from it's favorite person or drive its favorite person away from someone or something else. I would think that behavior would be rare in ringnecks because they don't pair bond for life.

Well, you ringneck people correct me if I am wrong on that. Is there something Kate should be worried about in relation to the safety of her young children around a ringneck?


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post #10 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-29-2011, 12:58 AM
 
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even though I love my Peanut I would not trust her around any children she isn't bitey alot but she has her days and yes she can give a good bite

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post #11 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-29-2011, 02:29 AM Thread Starter


 
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Oh, ok. All good ideas. What about Senegal? Conure? Quaker? Do they bite hard. I think a tiel in the house would just shout to the tiels in the garden all day. Thing is I love Bob. I'm gonna chat to hubby and see if we can put Bob in the living room for a trial period. I cant really suddenly put him out in mid winter anyway.

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post #12 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-29-2011, 05:34 AM


 
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i love solo and have got really good at reading his mood and body language but i dont let little kids play with him or even my friend because he lifts skin and can bite so that it bleeds and if hes tired or in a really cranky mood and hes on my shoulder he will lunge at my face although he has never actually biten my face, but i havent been biten by him in month or so

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post #13 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-29-2011, 07:18 AM
 
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My hubby is pretty good about those things. He knows that I am the one tending to the pets so he really has no say in the matter. It doesn't affect him really. I'd find out why yours doesn't want it and see if you can't strike a compromise. If he's out doing his thing a lot then it's rather unfair for him to say you can't do something you want to do.
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post #14 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-29-2011, 08:40 AM


 
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The large bird I have that is the most trustworthy around children is Cannary's maximillian pionus. Not all pionus are as gentle as she is, but a good many of them are.
Our bourkes is also very good with children. A bourkes is a little enough bird that it isn't going to do any real damage even if it would want to do so, but most bourkes never do want to do so. There is one bourkes, maybe on this forum, that has been reported to be nippy. It is very rare for a hand-reared bourkes to become nippy.
Our linnie is also very gentle and reliable with all types of children. There are many linnies who are this gentle, but not as high a percentage of linnies are in this category as are bourkes.
I'm serious when I say I cannot recommend a hand-reared bourkes highly enough if you want a very reliable bird for children. They are also very sweet with their vocalizations. If I had a hubby who was afraid of having a bird in the house because of children or noise, I would definitely go with a bourkes.
My green cheek is really good with my eleven year old daughter, but a green cheek might be a bit too much bird for children as young as yours. Now this is only if you want the kids to be able to play with the bird indepently.
If your children can be trusted to follow your rules and not bother a bird unless you are right there with them helping them, I don't see any reason why you couldn't keep Bob in the house as long as you know him well. If, however, you might have more babies in the future, you would have to consider a little toddler could get its little fingers in a cage before you realized it.

BUT, YES! I AGREE! Bob can't go outside in this weather! (You are NOT a person who needs tips regarding how to put a good slant on things.)


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Stanley (bourkes), Roni (senegal), Elisa (lineolated parakeet) and Doug (pacific parrotlet), Daisy (maximilian pionus), Shira (green cheek conure), Ashlynn, (grey), Taylor (princess of wales parakeet), Joelle (quaker), Benny (cockatiel)

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post #15 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-29-2011, 09:12 AM
 
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The only way I get my way with my husband as if we've had a fight and hes in the dog house. lol Thats how Ive gotten all my birds.

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post #16 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-29-2011, 11:09 AM Thread Starter


 
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Shanna, its always me in the dog house lol!
Donna, I'm not allowed any more kids. And 3 and 5 is too young to leave alone with a bird.

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post #17 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-29-2011, 11:24 AM
 
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Geez. What are you allowed? My 4 year old is never alone with my birds but he handles all my birds. Hes very gentle with them and they all like him.

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post #18 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-29-2011, 11:38 AM Thread Starter


 
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I'm gonna put my foot down!
We're off to a Halloween party so dutch courage for me!
Or one of us is on the sofa! Lol
He has to understand, my life is incomplete.
Trial period.
We shall see! In the meantime broomsticks ready!

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post #19 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-29-2011, 11:41 AM
 
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LOL Stand your ground Kate!!!! Its your home too and if he is rarely there what should he care! Men! UGH! (no offence to the wonderful men of this group though. )

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post #20 of 35 (permalink) Old 10-29-2011, 03:12 PM
 
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my family doesnt much like birds but there understanding enough they know how much I love them, I know its hard when your familys split up about birds though, I think alot of people fall for there charm once they meet them, my sister is terrified of birds but she likes my linnie

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