Will she still bond to me? - Talk Parrots Forums

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post #1 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-23-2013, 09:51 AM Thread Starter


 
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Will she still bond to me?

My question is, will Mina still bond to me if she is always out with my budgie? Weekdays I take them out at the same time...sometimes weekends too.

It is very obvious that Mina feels more confident when Cozette comes to me and just generally having Cozette around, so I think seeing her trust me helps Mina. Cozette has also helped Mina with eating. So there are a lot of benefits.

But Mina isn't really bonded to me and still has a lot of anxiety being with me and although she will step up now, she will stay for a few seconds then fly back to her safe space. She does get excited when I come in the room, even when she is already with Cozette so I know it is not just in anticipation of me letting her see Cozette. So is this normal in the progression of bonding with a linnie? I haven't had to try to bond with a bird when there was another bird (for bonding) serving as direct competition. With my plet, it was just me and him. With Cozette, same thing bcz her and my plet don't really get along. Also it seems like linnies might take a little longer to warm up to people but less long to warm up to new things than my other two birds.

I want these two girls to be friends and I am very glad they get along, but I also want Mina to bond to me. So far, Cozette still loves me so I think that relationship hasn't changed much.

Any advice would be appreciated.

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Last edited by 4thebirds; 10-23-2013 at 09:55 AM.
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post #2 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-23-2013, 02:40 PM


 
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4thebirds, you've had Mina for such a short time. She is still a baby, she was separated from her parents and flock, of course she feels more comfortable with Cozette.
They have a gorgeous bird friendship, Mina will learn a lot from her.
And by the time I'm sure she also will learn to trust you. She has already made good progress, she has learned to step up.
Just be patient, we Germans say: Parrots come by themselves.
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post #3 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-23-2013, 02:59 PM Thread Starter


 
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Originally Posted by Flapping Mama View Post
4thebirds, you've had Mina for such a short time. She is still a baby, she was separated from her parents and flock, of course she feels more comfortable with Cozette.
They have a gorgeous bird friendship, Mina will learn a lot from her.
And by the time I'm sure she also will learn to trust you. She has already made good progress, she has learned to step up.
Just be patient, we Germans say: Parrots come by themselves.
I know bonding takes time. I have had many birds before (but always kept singly-so they bond very tightly to me), but maybe my question was misunderstood, I have heard that birds won't bond has much to humans if they have the choice of another bird. So will her relationship with Cozette make her less interested in me? Should I have her with me more without Cozette? So my question is really more about bonding with humans when you have 2 or more birds who are friends as opposed to singly kept birds that are tame, if that makes sense. Geared toward people who have multiple tame birds who are bonded.

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post #4 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-23-2013, 09:22 PM
 
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We had Squirt for 3 weeks before we got Cricket. They love to come out and be with us. I thought Squirt would be more attached to us then Cricket but she actually loves everyone that comes here, where Squirt just likes who he knows. So even though they have each other Linnies still seam to want to be with people.

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post #5 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-23-2013, 09:57 PM Thread Starter


 
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Originally Posted by DebiWings View Post
We had Squirt for 3 weeks before we got Cricket. They love to come out and be with us. I thought Squirt would be more attached to us then Cricket but she actually loves everyone that comes here, where Squirt just likes who he knows. So even though they have each other Linnies still seam to want to be with people.
Thanks so much, that was very helpful.

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post #6 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-23-2013, 10:52 PM


 
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I agree. Linnies love other birds and they love people......my two are just as attached to me as they were before they were allowed to be together. That being said, Pikachu is still a little more independent and Stitch still loves to snuggle near my neck. They didn't really become more/less friendly when they were allowed to live in the same cage together (although they did go through a 1-2 wk period where they were focused on each other and it seemed that they no longer wanted to be with me, but then they returned to their normal selves)

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post #7 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-24-2013, 07:47 AM
 
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I would start having some one on one time away from her "safe" places. A room she is not use to would be a good idea. Don't have to be long. 10 minutes or so. This should help her see you as a safe place.
Good luck

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post #8 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-24-2013, 01:26 PM Thread Starter


 
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Originally Posted by Topaz View Post
I would start having some one on one time away from her "safe" places. A room she is not use to would be a good idea. Don't have to be long. 10 minutes or so. This should help her see you as a safe place.
Good luck
Thank you for this. I was feeling this was something I needed to do too and have been doing it but only for a few minutes at a time because she just gets so distressed! That is when she turns into A.D.D. bird and starts climbing, flying, and running everywhere, lol (sometimes she even starts panting) ---it's like she is trying to get away from me even tho everything is unfamiliar in the new room. It is bizarre because in the spaces she IS familiar with, she is much more comfortable with me. I have definitely deduced that these are anxious behaviors, lol. When she is nervous she just starts darting around, lol. When she is not nervous she is active, but it is not the same....she is sooo fast when she runs! It is actually quite funny, lol.

Anyway, this is the opposite of what I have experienced with other birds. My experience has been that in their safe spaces my other birds try to get away from me, but in unfamiliar places they try to stay with me because I am the most familiar..?

She is quite puzzling. It is like her familiarity with me doesn't transport to new environments, lol. I know it will take time, I just like to hear people's experiences, advice, and tips to make sure I am doing the "right" or "best" thing for her and our relationship. Especially with linnies, because so far they have been very different than the other birds I have had experiences with.
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post #9 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-24-2013, 03:20 PM



 
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I was going to suggest taking her away from her 'safe' zone, though that may make her more uncomfortable. If you spend time with her on her own then I can't imagine why she wouldn't wanna spend time with you. Let her spend time with your budgie and with yourself separately and together
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post #10 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-24-2013, 05:21 PM


 
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I would not suggest to take her away from her save zone, because that might make her even more scared and won't help her trusting you.
Linnies hate all things that are not famillar, and she is a baby that was taken away from her family.
I also would let her spend as much time as possible with Cozette.
In our former linnie forum many people bought a linnie baby and kept it solitary to make it bond with its human quickly.
And many of these linnies got severe behavioral problems when going through their puberty: screaming, biting, cage aggression or plucking.
Our pet birds also build their identity interacting with adults of their own species like we humans do, so they need enough chances to do so.
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post #11 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-24-2013, 10:45 PM
 
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[QUOTE=4thebirds;154233]...she is sooo fast when she runs! It is actually quite funny, lol.

Isn't it funny how fast they can run?! Usually it is a slow deliberate walk; it doesn't seem as though they do anything fast--then they take off!
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post #12 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-26-2013, 07:44 PM
 
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About a month ago I adopted my Karma, my cremino. She is attracted to Levi who has become fond of her too. I let them play together. Karma also likes visiting in Levi's cage. She is already bonded to me and that has not changed. But just to be sure they sleep in separate cages.

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post #13 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-26-2013, 08:17 PM
 
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[quote=carolynhh;154521]
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Originally Posted by 4thebirds View Post
...she is sooo fast when she runs! It is actually quite funny, lol.

Isn't it funny how fast they can run?! Usually it is a slow deliberate walk; it doesn't seem as though they do anything fast--then they take off!

When Squirt runs he puts his head down and runs so fast.

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post #14 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-27-2013, 12:52 AM Thread Starter


 
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[quote=DebiWings;155105]
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Originally Posted by carolynhh View Post


When Squirt runs he puts his head down and runs so fast.
Yeah that sounds exactly right.

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post #15 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-27-2013, 10:03 AM
 
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Well to tell the truth we call it his rat run, because that's what he looks like. He puts his head down and runs so close to the floor he can zip right under things. We don't like them on the floor but sometimes he flies down. Cricket never goes on the floor but Squirt is the runner.

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post #16 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-27-2013, 12:30 PM Thread Starter


 
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Originally Posted by gemini1 View Post
About a month ago I adopted my Karma, my cremino. She is attracted to Levi who has become fond of her too. I let them play together. Karma also likes visiting in Levi's cage. She is already bonded to me and that has not changed. But just to be sure they sleep in separate cages.
Yes, I don't think Mina is bonded to me but maybe my definition is different than yours??

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post #17 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-28-2013, 08:18 PM
 
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Linnies are really a different kind of bird in how they bond to humans. How much they were handled, being near people sometimes influence that.Was your hand fed or fed only by her bird parents? I've had Levi for over 2 yrs. I know the breeder she handled him a lot. Still he is what I call the independent linnie. Levi SOMETIMES comes forward in his cage when I talk to him and comes out of the cage when the door is open to be on his cage or the play stand,which is next to me and that's about it. He can fly but doesn't unless I get too pushy to be with him. He never wants me to hold, or cuddle him. Levi doesn't like my hands. Sometimes he will get on and off my shoulder if I lean toward him so he can. I can rest my cheek on his body for a short time and that's it. That is just Levi. The other birds mean nothing to him. My other 2 linnies and 8 yr. parrotlet bonded to me. Which means they enjoy being with me, showing an interest in what I'm doing. Like being on my shoulder or fingers, hand as well. I can touch and kiss them, hand toys to them. Actually that's part of the reason I adopted my other 2 linnies ( not at the same time) in hopes they would bond to me like they have. But there was no guarantee. Mina might be a linnie like Levi. Just try getting her use to being near see where it goes from there.
Let us know how it goes!

owned by linnies: Levi, Skyler Karma, and Bindi
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post #18 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-28-2013, 08:42 PM Thread Starter


 
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Linnies are really a different kind of bird in how they bond to humans. How much they were handled, being near people sometimes influence that.Was your hand fed or fed only by her bird parents? I've had Levi for over 2 yrs. I know the breeder she handled him a lot. Still he is what I call the independent linnie. Levi SOMETIMES comes forward in his cage when I talk to him and comes out of the cage when the door is open to be on his cage or the play stand,which is next to me and that's about it. He can fly but doesn't unless I get too pushy to be with him. He never wants me to hold, or cuddle him. Levi doesn't like my hands. Sometimes he will get on and off my shoulder if I lean toward him so he can. I can rest my cheek on his body for a short time and that's it. That is just Levi. The other birds mean nothing to him. My other 2 linnies and 8 yr. parrotlet bonded to me. Which means they enjoy being with me, showing an interest in what I'm doing. Like being on my shoulder or fingers, hand as well. I can touch and kiss them, hand toys to them. Actually that's part of the reason I adopted my other 2 linnies ( not at the same time) in hopes they would bond to me like they have. But there was no guarantee. Mina might be a linnie like Levi. Just try getting her use to being near see where it goes from there.
Let us know how it goes!
I figured "bonded" might be different with linnies. Mina likes me around, but doesn't want to stay with me if that makes sense. She will take food from me, come out to me, she does get excited when I come in but comes out and plays. She will not stay with me.

My budgie or plet will stay with me, they generally feel I am more safe in different less visited areas. Which I guess is the main difference. Both of these two will let me handle them with no real stress involved, also not the case with Mina. My budgie and plet will sit on my shoulder or finger...take things from me, etc., let me pet them (mostly plet, budgie doesn't like pets as much) and kiss them all over.

So far Mina gets pretty stressed at any handling and will ocassionally allow a pet if in her cage and I am not holding her.

She was handfed, but I got her real young. Not sure there was much socializing.

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post #19 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-29-2013, 11:30 AM Thread Starter


 
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Mina just runs around frantically if anything stresses her out--while making this sound that makes you have this urge to respond that you just can't suppress. Like what is wrong???? When she gets like this, she is not consolable. Her stressed out behavior hasn't really improved in the 7 weeks I have had her. If at all, maybe 10%? It just makes me wonder if it ever will....because she is so frantic, it makes me feel frantic and the other birds too.
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post #20 of 42 (permalink) Old 10-30-2013, 12:25 PM
 
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Quote:
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Mina just runs around frantically if anything stresses her out--while making this sound that makes you have this urge to respond that you just can't suppress. Like what is wrong???? When she gets like this, she is not consolable. Her stressed out behavior hasn't really improved in the 7 weeks I have had her. If at all, maybe 10%? It just makes me wonder if it ever will....because she is so frantic, it makes me feel frantic and the other birds too.
I'm sorry you are having such a hard time. On socialization when I ask one breeder if the bird has been socialized. She said" the bird was taken out of the cage and fed 4 times a day" I did not get one of their linnies. When birds are kept only in the cage for a long time and not let out they become cage bound. The birds act like your bird frantic like your Mina. You could talk to the breeder maybe she will take her back. OR you need to spend time with only Mina. Basic things like leave the door open sit in front of it talking to her. Have her wings trimmed by someone who REALLY knows. Should only be the first 3-4 of the flight feathers. Encourage her to come forward with millet. Every so often my Skyler acts upset (I'm wear two shirts the top one is my poop shirt ) I pick him up stick him under the first shirt placing my hand over him holding him gently while talking quietly to him. Till he calms down. I leave him under my shirt till he figures how to get out as long as he is still calm. Otherwise I let him out encourage him to just sit on me. See if Mina will just sit on her cage with the door open have a toy on the top so she can play with, or a piece of crumpled up paper and you play with it with a finger maybe tear off a small piece in front of her. I think you can bring her around to being more relaxed but it will take a lot of work and patience. Let me know how it goes.

owned by linnies: Levi, Skyler Karma, and Bindi
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